It Is (Depression)It is a shroud of black velvet.
Vision: Does the artwork reflect a point of view, theme, or idea?
My response: It has a theme that is throughout the entire poem, the theme is Depression. Also, the poem has a point of view about depression being that depression for this person is "impossible to lift" and it's this person's death sentence, I would consider that a point of view, though I wouldn't call it very original. However, I love some of the descriptions
Originality: Is the artwork fresh or new in its style, execution or approach? Is it something you haven’t seen before in its particular genre? Does it surprise you?
The overall theme isn't very original, it's another one of those depression morbid depression poems, and I don't see any hidden meanings besides the overall depression, this doesn't surprise nor excite me. However, it is very relatible for many people, and the actual descriptions and analogies used and some of the words were very unique and interesting. My particular favorite being, shroud of black velvet, monster in the shadows, final clash of symbols in carmina burana, it is my disability, it is my death sentence <--- these i found very original and surprising. Great work here.
Technique – Was the artwork skillfully created? Does the artist exhibit advanced knowledge of the medium and/or bring special focus to the craft of the medium used.
My response: I noticed a few grammatical errors, which could be easily fixed. I liked that you included punctuation. For example stanza 2 you didn't capitalize the "i" in line 2.. I'm pretty sure it was an accident.
Stanza 1 seemed to flow well and end well with satisfying sound to it. However, stanza 2 was without as much satisfaction like when I got to the ending line I felt like it was ending with missing note or the wrong note maybe? as far as flow goes anyway. If you know what i mean?
Although, I really like how stanza 3 & 4 turned out as far as flow they sounds great!
Impact – Does the artwork resonate with you or evoke strong emotions? Does it make you think? Does it blow your mind?
My Response: The artwork resonates with me as I understand and can relate to most of these feelings like said before some of the words and descriptions were brilliant, it wasn't too long and so I didn't get bored, but like I said it still has that easy to relate to feel, and judging by the comments I'm not the only one.
However, it's like a wow, blow my mind, but it is well thought out.
Overall, great poem, very easy to relate to and emotional, excellent descriptive work and analogies, but would hope for a bit more depth (as in more than the obvious depression or least maybe a more original point of view).
Great work! Don't stop writing!