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November 23, 2012
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There she cowers, in the cold  heart of blackness,
Scratching claws, stupidity, on iron bars,
Despair only driving her to madness;
Her mind in torment, reminding ageless scars.

Pacing back and forth in her confinement,
She laments like an animal, trapped forever;
Tears grace her cheeks with bitterness not refinement;
She plotted her escape but they screamed, No never!

She’s done this to herself resignation no other
She’s signed up for torment, she’s signed up for hell!
Wandering from one restricting corner to another
Ragged, torn, and crawling  filth; they swear, don’t tell.

Her ashen cheeks all sunken and hollow
Her hopes once dared to dance, locked down forever
And this is the hell, that was willed follow
Hope, her little friend, now tethered at the end

She wouldn’t give herself a chance, if honestly she did
She’d been freed not pathetic existing beast
In the depths of her beating chest tears protruded
A whisper for help her cumbersome lips suppressed

Like a bolt and with a flash iron locks snapped
And there her little friend, hope, smiled
Looking down into the deep ravine she collapsed
Jump! I’ll catch you , her dearest friend beguiled

Finally, liberty at last?
Now this? Some kind of test?
The iron bars had been crushed
She was free now, it was hard to digest

She crept to the door and got very close
Until fear her evil master yanked her blouse
Nearly suffocating her with his sickening smoky breath
Her mind dwelt only breeding death

Her doom prowled like a fierce-some cat
It's evil piercing eyes glared, at her dreary face,
She dared to move, she dared to dive
But she knew now she could not survive
:iconroselynedwards:
Written by Roselyn Edwards
Status: final draft
Additional Comments: I'm not sure if the concept of this poem is portrayed clear enough, or at all the beast at the end that doesn't let her go is supposed to be fear not letting embrace hope, I'm not sure if I represented that very well. Let me know if I should make that part more explicit to portray that feeling or is it portrayed fine already?
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:icondragonschest:
=DragonsChest Nov 23, 2012  Professional Writer
This was awesome... :wow:
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:iconroselynedwards:
Mood: Joy *roselynedwards Nov 24, 2012  Student Writer
you're too kind! :)
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:iconlaur-icula:
Another great piece! So descriptive and well written! ^.^
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:iconroselynedwards:
*roselynedwards Nov 23, 2012  Student Writer
Thank you Lauren! :) This is actually a really old piece I wrote a long time ago, but I altered the last couple stanzas and switched some things around with it and then reposted it :)So this is the newer version.
How was your thanksgiving btw?
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:iconlaur-icula:
Well I love what you did with it!
Mine was fantastic, lots of delicious food! How was yours?
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:iconroselynedwards:
*roselynedwards Nov 23, 2012  Student Writer
Thanks :) My poems are so repetitive hahha
yea mine was too, way too much good food though haha
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:iconlaur-icula:
I think that's the fun part of Thanksgiving, stuffing yourself with food to the point where you can't really move ^.^
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:iconroselynedwards:
*roselynedwards Nov 23, 2012  Student Writer
hahhahah I suppose you're right :P
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